Rescue Dogs and Mental Health with Rocky Road Rescue — Part Two
“I don’t believe in borders. A dog is a dog.”
Welcome back to part two of my interview with the lovely ladies from Rocky Road Rescue! If you’ve not seen part one, check it out for extra context, the story of the charity, and some surprising tidbits.
We’re trying to bring over abandoned dogs that are just not wanted anymore. We don’t bring over dogs with serious behavioural issues as we don’t want anyone getting hurt.
As with part one, we’re talking about animal abuse, death, and shitty people, so please click away if that’s too much for you.
Maybe you’re wondering, “Why adopt from Romania?”
Recently I was on Facebook, and there was a news post about a local shelter on my feed. People were saying, “Ugh, and some people are choosing to bring in dogs from Romania!” So I went on a really polite tirade. Firstly, just because there’s one issue, that doesn’t erase another issue. We can focus on two things at once. It’s not a this-or-that kind of problem.
We don’t have vast street dog issues in the UK because we don’t have the history that came with Romania’s street dog population. In the late ’80s, the country’s dictator replaced the suburban, sprawling areas with apartments. People were forced to move into these buildings, leaving no space for the dogs. Their owners dumped them on the street. Naturally, they bred, causing a huge street dog population in the hundreds of thousands.
Generally, Romania has minimal, poorly written animal welfare laws. This extends to their views on spaying and neutering, along with misconceptions about the practice. Many charities are working on spay and neuter campaigns to naturally reduce the street dog population. Mass sterilisation is preferable to Romania’s barbaric culling methods, and it lasts for much longer.
Romania’s mass killing and capture contracts are teeming with corruption (Big TW: this link is very heavy and describes killing methods — click at your own risk. There are fantastic stats about neuter and return on page five, though). Often, politicians give these contracts to friends and family. These are the dreaded “dog catchers” who take or kill the dogs on the street by any means necessary.
There are brutal kill shelters in Romania, an issue we don’t have here in the UK. Here, we love dogs; we want to care for them and try and rehome them. In Romania, some see dogs and cats as vermin and abuse them for pleasure. Dogs have to fight for food and live in filthy shelter conditions. Their laws only allow 14 days for an animal to find a new home before euthanasia.
In the UK, euthanasia is humane and painless, but they don’t care about that in Romania. Some shelters euthanise humanely, and others use the cheapest possible means. Sometimes, the dogs don’t even get to shelters; instead, they’re killed on the street like vermin with poison and other horrific methods. Unfortunately, animal welfare is far from a priority in Romania and many other countries.
So that’s my argument for rescuing from Romania. Again, this doesn’t change the fact that dogs need homes in the UK, but their circumstances are very different. I asked co-founder Alex for her view.
What’s your argument for rescuing from Romania?
Alex: I have a few views on it. We work on a case-by-case basis, and we’re rehoming family dogs. If you go to Dogs Trust and tell them you have a child, another dog, or that you work, they won’t give you a dog.
I’m not in the business of rehoming a dog to someone with a very young child or a child with no idea about dogs. In specific cases, we will assess and make a judgement call. Those cases have been some of our most successful adoptions, like Tipi and Basil (now Domino and Popcorn). Their little girl had grown up with German Shepherds.
Caroline: They had two kids who were two-and-a-half and five years old.
Alex: Their two dogs came straight off the street, but Basil and Tipi would play with the children. We thought about this particular adoption for a very long time, and we had lots of videos of the dogs’ temperaments and interactions with kids. We were confident these two dogs would be fine with the kids. It’s been brilliant. The videos we get of them are adorable.
The dogs we rehome are 95% of the time good all-round dogs.
They don’t come with serious behavioural issues, nor do they have to be an only dog and on-lead all the time. We’ve got dogs that rehome with cats, dogs that rehome with other dogs, and puppies, which many places like Dogs Trust don’t have.
As you said, Romania is appalling for how it treats its animals; we have seen horrendous things. I’ve been absolutely crucified for saying this before, but I don’t believe in borders. A dog is a dog. Just because it was born in England doesn’t mean it should get preferential treatment over a dog born in Romania.
It’s still a dog; it still deserves a home; it still deserves to be happy.
If there’s not a dog in Dogs Trust centres to suit a family, we might have one that can fit in with a family and their circumstances. Or maybe they can adopt one from Cyprus or Spain. They’re just animals.
Caroline: For example, Vicki (one of Rocky Road’s volunteers) tried to adopt from the UK first, but they wouldn’t let her. That’s why she chose a Romanian dog, and you see what a fantastic life Sofia has with them.
Alex: I wasn’t allowed to adopt from England.
Caroline: No, we weren’t either because we both worked, but I was only part-time at the office.
Alex: I worked teachers’ hours, and my partner worked shifts. Many want you to be retired, but even my Mum wasn’t allowed to when she went to adopt from Many Tears.
At the time, my Mum was still doing Crufts and Discover Dog stuff with her Ruby, a Smooth Collie. Their breed is nearly extinct. You’re not allowed to spay them in the show dog world. Because of this, Many Tears wouldn’t let my Mum adopt a dog, even though she’s retired with more dog experience than anyone I have ever met. She would have adopted a girl.
There would have been no way they were breeding.
They have some very strict rules. We have strict rules too, but we always work case-by-case. I’ll adopt to people in flats as long as they’re not trying to adopt a St. Bernard. We go by the person, by the feel of them, and how much experience they have. Most of the time, we get it right. Obviously, you’re always going to get a little bit of kickback. That’s just part of the job.
How do you deal with someone returning a dog?
Me: Not just the practical side of it, but when you’re emotionally invested, like, “Oh, finally, we’ve rehomed this dog!” How does that feel when you know you’ve got to bring it back and find someone new? I’ve been privy to a couple of returns you’ve dealt with, and they’ve been over ridiculous reasons.
Alex: We heavily rely on each other, especially in the Directorate. There’s a lot of work. The motto we stick by is “always remain professional in any circumstance.”
It doesn’t matter if we think the person is an absolute pleb and the dog has done nothing wrong. We remain professional; we never get nasty. We just say, “Okay, we have 21 days, so we’ll try to get this sorted as quickly as possible. That’s absolutely fine.”
Caroline: We never question it; we just get on with it.
Alex: We just deal with it. We bitch to each other, as we need to talk about it. The only way that you’re going to remain professional is if you get to rant elsewhere. But whatever the situation, they always get a phone call — usually from Caroline or Kate. My Mum and I will be in the background, and Caroline does the main amount of contact.
It can get really hard, especially if the person is difficult. Caroline’s recently had some really unpleasant people who want to use her as a counsellor. That is not her job. It’s not what she’s qualified as, and it’s not a service we provide. We can be empathetic, and we don’t judge, but that’s it.
People want us to feel sorry for them and comfort them. We can’t.
It sounds really cutting, but we aren’t there to be somebody’s therapist for their guilt. We’re here to sort the dog out, which we do. Our turnaround is usually about five days when someone hands back.
I work in mental health. Unfortunately, the biggest element of a hand-back is usually mental health on the adopter’s side. So we have to tread very carefully while not crossing any personal boundaries. We’re trying to remain a professional entity, where it’s just the animal we’re taking care of. But people try and push those boundaries a little bit.
Me: I respect that. I leaned on Caroline a bit in the early days because Cassi was an absolute ballache. She was a lot to deal with*, and I struggle with my mental health. So I can completely see how someone could be like, “I can’t handle this.”
Caroline was fantastic. She just said, “this is what we do,” and gave me practical advice. I appreciated that so much. We have a laugh as well, which is helpful when things are stressful. As you say, you are always professional, and I respect that about your charity in general, considering how hard it must be.
*Sidenote here about Cassi’s immensely annoying behaviour: She was a traumatised dog settling into a new environment, on high alert, and wondering who the hell had just moved her to a new country, speaking a weird language. I totally understood why she was struggling, but her constant whining was horrific for my misophonia. And having a dog sound like they’re in constant distress is also really upsetting! Almost 18 months on, she’s still a whiney little shit😂 But she’s been amazing for my mental health, and I wouldn’t change her for the world (well, maybe the whining). ❤
Alex: There’s a difference between dishing out behavioural advice and support to someone who wants to make it work and settle the situation, but just doesn’t know how to do it themselves.
Caroline: It’s really easy to see on messages and hear in people if they’re willing to work with it or not.
Alex: When you have someone who wants to hand back and then expects you to comfort them, it’s difficult for us.
We’re not trying to judge them, but they’re giving up.
Obviously, when we’re dishing out behavioural advice, there’s compassion because we understand things are hard. But when someone’s decided to give back... It’s tricky.
Me: Yeah, it sounds so hard. How have you found the whole thing generally, with your mental health? Sianna was talking to me the other day about it, and she said you get on with it because it’s just a job at that point. Still, I can only imagine how you feel afterwards.
How do you deal with the things you see when you’re out in Romania?
Alex: When you’re there in the moment, you just do it. You don’t cry; you focus on the task at hand.
Caroline: You can’t be too emotional because it will immediately break you down.
Alex: We’ve bargained our way into some private shelters, and we’ve done a lot of networking. They don’t want to let anybody in because you’ll see the state of the animals. If you start crying, they’re just going to kick you out. You have to keep a poker face; you can’t show much emotion. You’re trying to build a relationship with the Romanians, not break it down.
At Constanta Public Shelter, Mum and I both lost our shit there.
Mum screamed at the vet, and I screamed at the worker who kicked a disabled dog out the way. The dog was dying, and he kicked it out of the way. I just flipped my lid. Luckily, they let me take the dog away with me, which usually they wouldn’t because I was going crazy. But that’s the only time I’ve done it. You have to try and keep your emotions at bay. When we get home, there’s quite a bit of decompression.
Me: I think I’d lose it. Maybe I could hold it until afterwards, but that’d be it. I’d just be wailing and having nightmares.
Alex: You think you would, and Sianna felt the same. She thought she was going to be very emotional. You’re not — your mind is ticking overtime, making plans on how to bargain, beg, borrow, or steal to get this dog out. Sometimes that requires you to be very sickly and nice to the people who have been abusing the animal.
Me: Oh, that must feel dirty.
Alex: It really does. It’s not a nice feeling. But once you’ve got the dog, it’s worth it.
Caroline: It’s hard to deal with Romanians like that because all they want is the dog out and their money.
Alex: They want a foreign person to be subservient.
They want you to beg.
Sometimes we have to. We’ve had to beg to get some cats out. Well, we stole them in the end. But that’s another story.
(I need to hear this story)
How many animals have you personally adopted?
Me: I know Caroline has a big ol’ zoo going on.
Caroline: Compared to these two ladies?!
Alex: I have five dogs, but two of them are English — three are Romanian. I have two cats — one is English, and one is Romanian.
My Mum’s got nine dogs and four cats. One cat is Romanian, and four of her nine dogs are Romanian.
Me: It must be so hard not to take them all in. I’ve had to behave myself recently. I love Scrat so much, he’s so sweet and cute, but my other half has said no. I respect that he said no, and he’s right. You definitely have to be rational about it, but I’m struggling with that a little.
Alex: It is hard, especially when you’re driving around Romania, and you pick the animal up off the side of the road. Especially when it becomes very attached to you, so you just adopt another one.
I rescued my Ruby while I was in Romania, and I immediately had to have her because she’s disabled. I didn’t want her to get into the wrong hands or live her life in a shelter. My Romanian dog, Bobo, is blind. I was fostering him, but he mapped the house, and I felt guilty about it.
He'd cry if I tried to take him to another house, so he stayed.
Me: Ah, he emotionally manipulated his way to stay!
Alex: He did. Now he’s here, and he’s a pain in the arse. He’s blind and like a ninja. He does have a lovely singing voice. But my God, if he smells food, there’s no stopping him. Out of all my dogs, he’s the only one who would’ve bitten me if he could. If you try and stop him from raiding a bin, he’ll try and eat you. But he has no teeth.
Me: Attack of the gums! (That’s probably not going to be a Star Wars sequel.)
Stay tuned for the following parts, where we talk about behavioural challenges, fostering, pet peeves, and much more. Thank you for reading!
If you want to support Rocky Road Rescue, check out these links:
* Urgent food help needed! *
Rocky Road has a fundraiser for one of their rescuer’s shelters. Please consider helping to feed these pups. They’re all up for adoption, too! ❤
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